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8 Things Civilians Should Know Before Dating Someone in the Military . Military Spouse

WHY I LOVE BEING A MILITARY WIFE - THE BENEFITS

They have kids, they have base housing, they know their way in and out and through the military like I would know my way through a video game. Nothing makes me feel as self-conscious as being around people who have years of experience over me. I had never felt so alone as when I had to mingle with these people and get to know them, when I was so new to everything relatively speaking and had so little in common with them. But whatever military-hosted gathering you find yourself at, all you can do is get through it. So make friends with as many people who have dated, married, or been family to someone in the military.

8 Things Civilians Should Know Before Dating Someone in the Military

So make friends with as many people who have dated, married, or been family to someone in the military. One word: acronyms.

Acronyms everywhere. So just hold on, ask a few and only a few questions, and be patient.

Dating someone in the military

You will learn with time, and someday, it will be second nature to inquire where he will be PCSing to and whether his BAH has come in yet. So when their chain of command switches their duties to something awful, or when they are berated for three hours about something as small as having part of their uniform out of regs — just be there for them.

And I think, when you start out dating someone, you rarely think about everything that is coming down the pike. But military life (and military. Dating someone in the military is the same as dating a civilian. The problem comes as the relationship progress. It is extremely difficult to. r/AskWomen: AskWomen: A subreddit dedicated to asking women questions about their thoughts, lives, and experiences; providing a place where all .

If you can, give them a hug, hold their hand, and be still. Let them vent. Guys, especially, often prefer to just voice their problems — sometimes at great length — in order to get over a tough day. Girls tend to ask for real sympathy and sometimes a suggestion for how to amend their problems, seeking feedback more than a punching bag to take all their stress out on. Either way, soft encouragement along with simple physical gestures — hand-holding, a gentle squeeze on the arm, a hug — will let them know you care without being too much.

If distance separates you, listening is your greatest ally, along with your continued support and positivity.

Here are eight things to consider before jumping into a relationship with someone in uniform Service members are independent and you. By: Orvelin Valle Dating a service member is different than dating a civilian. But just how much different is it? Here are eight things to consider. Perhaps you are already dating someone in the military but want to know more before making a serious commitment. There are certain things that strong military .

You are their chance to live a normal life. Out of regs. With a real person they are so in love with. Remind them of that, and escaping the misery of their work will be easier for them.

I have yet to feel the everyday struggle of surviving a deployment, wondering if I will ever see him again. I know what it means to miss someone so painfully that I find myself thinking of no one else during every moment of the day.

5 Things to know BEFORE dating someone in the military - M.M.W

And you will too, if you find yourself in a similar LDR. They can be tough for people in the most exclusive, committed relationships. It can mess with your self-esteem and sense self-worth. You need to know who you are.

Have interests, hobbies, and friends. If your whole identity is wrapped up solely in your service member, it is going to be a tough, lonely life. Honestly, I think these are good things to think about before entering into any relationship— no matter the affiliation to the military.

Of course, you might have to modify them a bit, but the basic gist is there. I was married but separated from my ex at the time. I am now divorced with 2 small kids. Before he left we were dating for about 5 months. We fell in love, he supported me through the divorce, we shared I Love Yous and cried before he left.

We talk or text through a WiFi app everyday. But now he has orders that is on the other end of the US when his deployment is over. He asked me and the kids to move with him, I would in a heart beat because I love him and he makes me so happy, but my kids. I dont know if we are on our way to marriage but he says he dosent want to be without me. That is such a tough, sticky situation. I have not been in your shoes, so I may not be much help.

Great post, Jo! I think thanks to Hollywood a lot of people romanticize being with a military man, but it is hard work. I found this to be very honest and insightful! Thanks so much for doing it! Another super helpful post! Unfortunately, so many of them are now already ended because they could not handle the distance that came along with it sometimes.

I do agree with some points out of this. I have been married to my service man for over a year now and it is the most humbling spot I have had to be in. There are always marriages that fall prey to infidelity, neglect, and abuse. Glad I stumbled upon your sit. This helps me so much i printed it out. Okay me and alex we meet online.

We started to date on that day and well. He wants me to do that but i want to go to college and become a nurse.

I've heard of countless issues one faces when dating someone in the military — but oftentimes, I find myself facing problems no one warned me. Dating a military service member is not like dating a civilian. Military members Time spent waiting for someone else to talk first is time wasted. 4. Take turns.

What should i do? Should i wait for college untill next Fall?? I just found this and I wanted to thank you so much for everything that you do and write. So thank you for all the time and effort you take to write these, they help keep me going and help me find things to say to him when he needs it most. I really love your blog as well. Have you come across any support groups for military girlfriends? Would love to join one. I love your site. These are all really good points.

They are hard, there is not a lot of money, and you have to be really strong. So I think the more people know, the smoother they can transition!

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